The Return of the Moonwalker
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           God help me, I just couldn’t resist this one because say what you will about Michael Jackson, but Thriller was awesome. I’m an 80’s baby, so it was basically in my blood. Furthermore once I saw the international petitions trying to prevent the release of this film how could I possibly stay away? But can a love of Thriller be a bad thing? We shall see…
“Return of the Moonwalker†is written by, directed by and yes even staring Mike Maria and if nothing else after reading the synopsis I have to give this guy points for being able to fit together the pieces of a psychotic jig-saw puzzle-like plot that would give most of us a migraine and nightmares. Maria stars as the emcee of a traveling “punk circus†which could be strange enough on its own, but wait for it, he also time travels, is possibly responsible for the French Revolution and now in present day, is plotting to rule the world. So what stepping stone does a time traveling psychopathic circus freak need to climb into his throne atop the world? The answer to that absurdity-laden question is evidently, Michael Jackson’s zombie.
Should we be surprised that such a strange zombie flick has emerged from Germany? Probably not considering that zombie movies like “Otto†have shambled out of Deutschland. But I found myself watching the trailer for “The Return of the Moonwalker†with the same head tilted, quizzical expression that my dog makes after he surprises himself with a fart.
“The Return of the Moonwalker†is absurd. That goes without question. It is also rife with all of the typical Michael Jackson jokes one would expect, but there is something about it, that much like Troma movies, duct tapes you to the couch and forces you to watch it.
NEWS FLASH: Michael Jackson’s hand has been stolen from his crypt in LA!!
The culprits: two love-struck leather dwarves, acting on the orders of Dr. Cagliostro, a time-traveling sorcerer posing as the manager of a “punk circus†in Berlin. The mysterious mystic’s mad plan: use the risen Michael to rouse the masses and ignite a global revolution!
Realizing something strange is afoot, two lesbian ghost hunter girls and three horny college dudes team up to infiltrate Cagliostro’s circus. Things come to a head when the rapidly decaying Jacko-Zombie Messiah takes over the circus and starts his own “Rainbow Revolution†one that quickly descends into chaos.
Can the kids stop Doomsday before it’s too late?
